My little girl

Well, a few months into this whole dad thing and I think I've got a pretty good handle on how this goes. That is until the little one decides that she wants something different. Watching your child grow and figure things out might be one of the most incredible things you'll ever witness. The discovery of hands and feet and how easily they can be jammed into ones mouth. The recognition of mom and dad's voices and smells. The knowledge of - if I cry they come and check on me - which she figured out early and now uses to her advantage. Rolling over from back to front or vice versa. It is pretty special to see that look in their eyes when the "light bulb" goes off.

I have noticed a few new things about myself too. Now, if you'd have asked me at the beginning of my wife's pregnancy if I wanted a boy or a girl I would have said " I don't care as long as they are happy and healthy" and "as long as mom is okay and baby is okay everything else is details".

I LIED...

As a man, silly as it may be, I wanted a boy. Whether it is the whole "carry on the family name" thing or just having a little version of me around - I don't know, it is dumb regardless. I couldn't be any happier to have had a little baby girl and wouldn't change it for the world. Having said that, the prospect of having a girl is the single most terrifying thing in the world for me. And here is why....

I was at the drive-in with "Ky" and Brooklyn not that long after she was born - we needed a night out!!! I couldn't help but notice that there was a LOT of pre-teen/teenage boys and girls running around. Upon closer inspection of the situation, I noticed that, as boys and girls do, there was a lot of flirting and playful touching to just blatant make out sessions.
**I SHUDDER AS I WRITE THIS**
I can't handle the thought of that stage in my little girls life. The boys, the heartbreak, the ...uh.. sex. I just want to lock her up until she's 25... If she gets my wife's body and looks with my height I might just end it all... Picture a 6 foot tall Reece Witherspoon with bigger boobs... No dad should have to handle that. The other thing is if she brings home one of these disrespectful punk kids, and you know who you are, it is over. I hope that by the time she is that age that this whole "emo" look and the "popped collar" crap is long gone. Look, I get the whole trying to be yourself and express who you are by being original and what not, but here is a news flash kids...

"YOU ALL LOOK THE F**KING SAME!!!!"

Does everyone shop at stores with birds as their logo. Try and get a job with your ear lobes all stretched to hell, or has anyone seen a CEO wearing "guy-liner" - don't think so...

I can handle the bras and the periods and all of that stuff that comes with being a girl. The physiology of it is not something that scares me. But the first boy that she brings home... I feel sorry for that poor bastard - whether he's nice or not - he will feel the wrath of DAD.. I apologize to both Brooklyn and "Ky" because I just don't know if I'll deal very well at all.

I know I have a while to go before she's at that stage so I might just have enough time to wrap my head around it...

In the words of the wise "Larry the Cable Guy" - Lord, I apologize....