Baby Brain - perhaps you've heard this term if you are already a dad or going to be one in the near future. If not, then this should be your forewarning, so pay attention.
I don't remember exactly when it started but I would say it happened around the 4 to 5 month period and continues on through until the baby is born and in fact, several months after that. Baby Brain is the process by which the wee one eats away at any and all brain functions. General movement is not seemingly affected but you can wave bye bye to all cognitive thinking, normal intelligent conversation and sentences that don't involve "goo-goo" or "gaa-gaa". Your baby is officially an "intellectual parasite" that is being harboured in your wife/girlfriend uterus and is living on her brains.... MMMMMM, bwains....
It starts off slowly.. Staring aimlessly into space, pregnant (no pun intended) pauses between a question asked to answer given and the classic muddling of words. Nothing too significant by any means. Ah, but wait, there's more. Pretty soon all memory is shot to hell and the formulation of sentences are virtually non-existent. Imagine having your tongue 10 sizes too big for a mouth 10 sizes too small... That kind of stumbling over your words - it is just brutal... The birth of your child actually does nothing to help and in fact hinders the recapturing of ones linguistic abilities. How much can one develop (or redevelop) when your partner in conversation can't even lift their own head yet let alone speak?? Talk about reverting back to ones "caveman/woman" self, you end up sounding like Tarzan mixed with The Incredible Hulk.
"Baby no like sleep", "Mom need baby too sleep", "Baby go sleep now"
FYI, this process isn't unique to women either. I told you, they are "intellectual parasites" ... As soon as you hold your baby, an cerebral osmosis occurs fast and without warning... That little smile on their face when you pick them up and make funny faces at them or make strange noises, they aren't laughing at you. They are laughing because they are sapping you of all your brain power. They've got you right where they want you...
At some point this may go away and both "Ky" and I will resume normal brain functioning, I hope.. But until then I will bask in the glory that is our new dim witted, unfocused, brainless selves... Thanks a lot Brooklyn, thanks a lot...
"Daddy no like having no brain, me miss smart talk"....
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